Roots and my ravenous heart - JJ Landis
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roots and ravenous heart

Roots and my ravenous heart

 

Unloved.

Useless.

These words are buried deep.

 

The seeds were sprinkled by adults

when my heart was fertile.

But it was me who cultivated.

I watered and tended.

What grew was

unlovely,

useless

fruit.

 

I was given talents.

I was gifted.

I hid them underground.

I covered it all.

They grew

despite my efforts to conceal.

But

talents

and gifts

were influenced and manipulated by those two words:

Unloved.

Useless.

Established roots held this life in place.

 

Fruit can be deceptive

with its color and texture and sheen. Its fragrance.

The praise after a taste,

I reject.

I doubt.

It’s never enough.

As others sample my pain, my life, my growth,

are they deceived or am I?

 

The dominating roots from long ago,

Unloved,

Useless,

hold me together, hold me up.

I can’t rip them out, destroy them

without losing myself.

Without them who would I be?

 

It is me – the one deceived.

 

Taste and see.

There’s health and nourishment too.

I’ve not consumed it. I’ve not smelled it. I’ve barely noticed the abundance.

Because I know from whence it grew:

Unloved.

Useless.

 

When will I take a bite and savor the outflowing of my life?

Today?

I’m hungry.

Life must grow. Growth needs life.

I am alive. I grow.

So long ago

when my heart was fertile,

the earth absorbed.

Today,

as my heart is ravenous,

I devour the fragrant, sweet, abundant fruit

that grows

from the depths of

healing.

 

Photo by Joanna Kosinska

6 Comments
  • Karen
    Posted at 09:23h, 13 July Reply

    Beautiful poem. Thanks for sharing!

    • JJ Landis
      Posted at 09:36h, 13 July Reply

      THANKS!!

  • Steve Austin
    Posted at 11:17h, 19 April Reply

    So much depth. My goodness. Thanks for sharing.

    • JJ Landis
      Posted at 11:43h, 19 April Reply

      Thanks. I think you may be the only person who will read this.

      • Steve Austin
        Posted at 11:47h, 19 April Reply

        Whatever!

      • Inge
        Posted at 10:38h, 21 April Reply

        Hey, don’t count me out! Your blog is one of few I read faithfully. So much of what you write resonates with me!

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